Monday, December 05, 2005

Dramatic Choice


This weekend I made a choice I would not normally make - I gave someone a second chance!

Regular visitors to my Blog will know that two weeks ago, a relationship ended that hurt me inside. My normal course of action in such events is just to cut that hurt out and not let it affect my day to day life. Indeed - I was doing quite well, still socialising and getting on with life without this person.
Yet everytime I recieved a text message on my phone, my hopes lifted - somehow hoping it was from a certain someone. But even when it was, I would throw the phone on the bed and huff , then not reply!
After getting a few text messages at the latter part of last week, I unblocked that person from my MSN and had a real long chat. We were able to talk and try and get to he bottom of things, explaining how we we'd both been feeling over the past two weeks.

I was now faced with a difficult choice - do I keep that person cut out of my life forever or do I make a dramatic move and change the situation?

I was originally going to stay with them this coming week (until we split up of course!) , but now I had made alot of alternative plans to do things with friends throughout the week. My discision to take that 6 hour journey and sort things out face to face, meant I'd have to cancel all my plans for the week with my friends in favour of trying to sort things out with the one person who made me so happy inside.

I was also taking the biggest risk of my life - they didn't know I was about to turn up outside their Uni room, so I could have a nasty surprise or fallen flat on my face. But this was a risk I was willing to take because I knew I couldn't just throw it all away as easily as I had been prepared to.

Like I said, I have had to cut people off in the past in order to survive and remain strong - yet now I was doing something totally different - I was going to see if I could bring something back to life. I thought I had buried the relationship only days before, now I was going to see if we both really wanted it to really die or had we made a terible mistake?

More updates to follow...............................

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